When I had had a physical examination as a 12-year-old girl in which the gynaecologist had confirmed that I had been sexually abused and had given birth several times, I dared to file a police report. During the report, the physical examination was not denied, but there was no record of it. So there was no evidence. Where is the doctor who did this examination? Has he forgotten me or has he been threatened?

The mother of a friend from school noticed that I was asking questions about her having a cup of tea with a biscuit with her daughter every day as soon as she came out of school. I thought it was very cosy, but also very weird. We had a brief chat in which I mentioned that I did not have these moments out of school, but usually had to get to work. After all, someone had to cook food and clean the house. She didn't say anything else about it, but I was no longer invited to their house to come and play. Was she afraid of me or afraid to know the world behind my story?

The PE teacher who always saw me with bruises and kept accepting a note with a reason why I could not join the gym never asked questions. Did he find it strange that I was always so black and blue and often unable to participate?

There is now an enquiry report into sadistic abuse, conducted by a non-independent commission, which makes looking away from strange things even easier.

It is safe to look away, forget about it and get on with the life that is so familiar. But if people don't stand up and find certain situations weird, how can ritual abuse ever come to light?

Do you dare to find something weird?

Esther